Cian Like Keyin

Leaving the Station by Jake Maia Arlow was published this August and follows Zoe, a freshman in college on the east coast, as they travel via Amtrak trains back to their hometown of Seattle during the holiday season. Arlow intersperses flashbacks from Zoe’s first semester of college with the train trip. On the Amtrak trains, Zoe meets Oakley, a queer girl who left a Mormon upbringing in rural Washington for the east coast. The two have conversations about sexuality, gender, religion (particularly in regard to the differences between their Jewish and Mormon upbringings), and eventually develop a romance.

At the beginning of the book, Zoe expresses that leaving for college a few months ago involved “…[figuring out] what being a lesbian meant to me, when it had been previously put on the back burner.” Though Zoe went into college relatively confident identifying as a lesbian and a woman, it is revealed through flashbacks that they quickly end up grappling with uncertainty after meeting Alden, a boy at their college they are immediately drawn to. In these flashbacks, Zoe begins dating Alden, feeling shame amongst a queer friend group and not wanting to invite questions about their sexuality. They frequently express thoughts that will lead them to realize they are not a girl:
“…I could see myself in him, a more masculine side of me,”
“…I tried to channel his mannerisms, his ease.”

Leaving the Station is very much a modern queer story in that the protagonist does not apparently struggle with their initial coming out as a lesbian in high school. Zoe immediately finds queer friends at college and expresses no conflicts with family. Their struggles begin when they cannot distinguish between wanting to be with a boy or wanting to just be like him, which is resolved in a matter of months. This timeline is almost unfathomable for someone like me who was a freshman in college well over a decade ago and had a much slower timeline in terms of figuring out sexuality and gender. At the same time, it is a reminder that (some) things have gotten better for young LGBTQ+ adults. It is refreshing to see a young, queer character in YA who is not spending years suffering or being bullied. Arlow also writes about realistic struggles young queer people deal with, especially those who come from religious backgrounds. At one point Oakley says to Zoe “To everyone else, being queer wasn’t a big deal. But for me, I needed it to be everything, or it couldn’t be anything.” Though she is no longer Mormon, Oakley tells Zoe she agrees with the teaching that “…salvation can only be achieved through community, not individual actions,” highlighting the importance of their connection and building queer community as young adults.

Overall, Leaving the Station is an optimistic, queer coming-of-age and romance story I recommend for teens and high schoolers. The characters’ desires for authenticity, community, connection, and love are relatable for any teen readers, regardless of queerness. This is an example of a book that truly would have changed so much for me as a teen!